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Family, friends and fate (NaBloPoMo, Day 13)

NaBloPoMo February 2012 From the BlogHer writing prompts:

Talk about this quote: “Fate chooses your relations, you choose your friends.”

I used to believe in fate, destiny; the “everything happens for a reason” deal. Not anymore. I didn’t come from fate; I come from circumstance.

I know how I was brought into this world. After being married 21 years, my parents decided to visit the local fertillity clinic so my mother could be artifically inseminated by my Dad. Same as what happened to my brothers. *wink*

All kidding aside, in my journey toward secular humanism, I found comfort in knowing not everything happens for a reason. Is it the fate of children all over the world to go hungry? Is it the fate for someone to be brutally attacked? No, it’s circumstance.

I’m glad I was born into my family. We’re all hilariously nutty. We make ourselves laugh waaaay too much, even if nobody else gets the joke.

The friends I’ve made over the years – and I’ve made a LOT – are also the result of circumstance. Maybe I sat next to them in class. Maybe we lived in the same dorm. Maybe we worked together, maybe we got along online.

As far as choosing your friends is concerned, I’m stuck in a paradox. While I think doing things like going to school or finding your bliss lead to long-lasting friendships, I also think there is a choice in friendships – and that’s more of who you choose to not be your friends.

I’ve had ties broken and broken ties with a number of friends over the years for various reasons. Those are choices people make. But when people connect, is that really a choice, or the result of circumstance?

Oh, philosophical questions I can’t answer. Golly-gee.

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