There is a war waging across the nation. The war on puppies – and it needs to stop.
Throughout this country, puppies are losing jobs, being laid off for months at a time, struggling to put kibble on the table – all because babies are trying to take over as the Cutest Living Beings In The World. And now it’s time for us to choose sides. Puppies vs. Babies – who will win?
For ages, puppies have warmed our hearts. Their cold, wet noses. The way they sit nicely for treats. And how brilliant they are! When have you ever seen a six-week-old baby walk? Do you ever see a two-year-old puppy running around in diapers? No, because they were potty-trained in two weeks!
If you don’t believe puppies are cuter than babies, take a look at this:
Now compare that with THIS!
AAAAAAAAAAAAUGH!!! He’s coming after me! Run for your lives!!!!
It is not too late to prevent babies from global catastrophe. You have Nov. 23 to vote in the Puppies vs. Babies online contest. The winning puppy (or baby, bleh) will win $5000. That’s enough to feed a family of six puppies for a year!
Vote! The future of puppykind depends upon it!